Anonymous asked: I wish I could listen to you guys all day because the show is all I have left of D&D. Once I had a DM, and he was an alright DM, made the game fun really. But I am Transgendered Male to Female, which was a problem for him I guess. He let me make female characters as long as they were busty and wore skimpy clothes, not me at all. But he never called my characters female pronouns, and (being pre transition) If I showed up as a man, he made me play a male character whether I wanted to or not.
Ok, let’s see…
First off, thanks for listening, I often forget to say that, each listener to Critical Hit (and our other podcasts) makes us more able to do the cool things we want to do. So thanks!
Second, regardless of the specifics don’t give up on RPGs because of a bad experience. There are plenty of groups out there looking for a player just like you.
Ok, now, I do take issue with one thing you said:
Once I had a DM, and he was an alright DM, made the game fun really.
followed up by… well, the rest of your message.
That doesn’t sound like a fun situation to me and you did the right thing by leaving. Sometimes it is difficult for me to really come down on people who freak out about trans issues because it is something that doesn’t get talked about a lot and when faced with it they may not know how to handle it. That said, it sounds like your former DM had some serious gender issues in general, it also sounds to me like you talked to him about it and he still decided that YOUR character should match HIS caveman gender rubric.
You really don’t have to put up with that shit, none of you do, whether you’re gay or trans or even just a totally cis lady, you don’t have to live in someone else’s weird gender cupboard.
And the worst part about this is that situations like this somehow make the player feel like they’re the ones in the wrong. I’ve had three different queer people pitch me characters of the opposite gender to theirs, and when I ask why, they say “Well, I’m a girl, but I like girls, and I want to play a character who likes girls.” Of course, my usual response is “Ok, just play a girl who likes girls.” But the crazy thing is that it keeps happening, and these people don’t even know each other, this is something that society is doing to our LGBTQ gamers and it needs to stop.
Soooo…. yeah, I guess what I’m saying is: If you’re transitioning then finding a gaming group is not going to be the hardest thing you’ll have to do, but it’s going to be challenging, that said there ARE groups out there who will accept you for who you are. Don’t give up!